The Unseen Wounds: Understanding Disenfranchised Grief
As a mental health therapist, I have encountered countless individuals grappling with loss. It is likely that if you are reading this (or have lived any length of time in this human existence) you have encountered loss, too. Loss, and the ensuing mourning and grief that comes along with it, can take many forms. Sometimes we suffer losses that don’t quite fit within the “norms” of what we have come to see as acceptable painful experiences. While many find solace in communal mourning and societal acknowledgment, others endure a more insidious form of suffering—disenfranchised grief. This form of grief, often overlooked and misunderstood, can have profound and lasting impacts on mental health and well-being.
What is Disenfranchised Grief?
Disenfranchised grief, a term coined by Dr. Kenneth Doka, refers to grief that is not acknowledged or validated by society. This can occur for various reasons: the relationship with the deceased may not be recognized, the loss itself may be minimized, or the grieving process might be deemed inappropriate by societal standards (Doka, 1989). For instance, the grief experienced by ex-spouses, caregivers, or pet owners often falls into this category.
The Impact on Mental Health
The effects of disenfranchised grief can be profound. Without societal validation, individuals may feel isolated and unsupported in their mourning. This isolation can exacerbate feelings of sadness, anxiety, and depression. Disenfranchised grief can lead to more complicated and prolonged mourning processes. Oftentimes, people find themselves in situations where those around them do not understand how to help them manage the pain associated with loss. Feeling connected to someone else who can offer compassion, patience, and stability when you are grieving is a piece of community that is sadly uncommon for many of us. When we find ourselves in these situations, it can compound the pain experienced in the losses that may not fit our societal parameters for grief.
Compounding Factors
Several factors can compound the impact of disenfranchised grief:
Lack of Social Support. When grief is not recognized, it often means a lack of support from friends, family, and the community. This can leave individuals feeling alone in their sorrow, without the necessary emotional scaffolding to process their loss.
Stigmatization. Certain types of loss, such as those involving addiction, suicide, or miscarriage, may carry a societal stigma. This can further alienate grieving individuals, who might fear judgment or blame.
Ambiguous Loss. Disenfranchised grief is often tied to ambiguous losses—situations where the loss is unclear or unresolved. Examples include the disappearance of a loved one or the cognitive decline seen in dementia. These ambiguous losses can make it difficult for individuals to find closure.
Moving Forward with Grief Therapy
Addressing disenfranchised grief requires a shift in societal attitudes and greater awareness. By acknowledging and validating all forms of grief, we can provide more comprehensive support to those suffering. As we continue to learn and grow in our understanding of grief, we strive to ensure that no one feels alone in their mourning.
If you find yourself struggling with something that feels like this, consider partnering with a therapist at Bridger Peaks Counseling to understand and address the nuances of disenfranchised grief. By recognizing the unseen wounds, we can navigate the grief journey toward healing and wholeness together.
Get Support in Grief Counseling Today at our Bozeman, MT Practice
Grief can be a lonely journey, especially when your pain is overlooked or misunderstood. At Bridger Peaks Counseling, we believe that all forms of grief deserve recognition and care. If you're struggling with disenfranchised grief or any form of loss, don't go through it alone.
Contact us now to start your journey toward wholeness.
Connect with a compassionate grief therapist who can help you navigate your unique experience and find the support you need.
Together, we can honor your grief and guide you toward healing.
Other Therapy Services We Offer in Missoula & Bozeman, MT
Our team of caring counselors at Bridger Peaks Counseling is happy to provide a variety of mental health services. Our team is happy to offer services including addiction counseling, teen counseling, group therapy, rising strong workshops, and body image counseling. Furthermore, we provide depression treatment, grief and loss counseling, and online counseling. Along with EMDR, postpartum anxiety depression counseling, marriage counseling, and psychiatric care. Visit our blog or FAQ to learn more today!
References
Doka, K. J. (1989). Disenfranchised Grief: Recognizing Hidden Sorrow. Lexington Books.